Andelman.com Articles Archive
"Profile:
Chris Thomas"
By Bob Andelman
(Originally published in Players, August 1991)
The green blinking light is pressed.
"Bobby from St. Pete, you're at bat. Take a swing!"
"Okay! I was at the airport the other day and Phil was
there. He's getting on a plane going to Newark. I said, 'Hey,
Phil! Good luck!' He said, 'Yeah, we're going to do it!'"
For those who don't know the players on a first-name basis,
Chris Thomas explains to the rest of his listeners that "Phil"
is Phil Esposito, president of the vaporware Tampa Bay Lightning.
"I have to think the National Hockey League is losing
its patience," opines Thomas, host of WFLA 970 AM's "Tampa
Bay Sports Line." "It has been two months."
"He looked really nervous," reports Bobby from St.
Pete. "I wondered if you have an update?"
"Naah," says Thomas, waving his hand in disgust
as if Bobby from St. Pete could see it. "Because the NHL
doesn't believe in the First Amendment and free speech, the league
has a gag order in place."
Bobby from St. Pete, satisfied, hangs up.
Thomas, 43, looks across the WFLA studio to his engineer in
the next room, explaining to him on the air how the name Bob
is a palindrome because it is spelled the same way backwards
and forwards. Only Thomas can hear Jesse's response in his headphones,
but he tells the engineer, "Jesse, you are not a palindrome,
you are a meathead."
Four nights a week, Tuesday through Friday from 6:30-8 p.m.,
WFLA-TV Ch. 8 sportscaster Chris Thomas gives up his dinner break
to spend 90 minutes talking to listeners on WFLA radio. It's
worth it, both to him and to listeners. There is no more commanding
presence and personality in local sportscasting on either TV
or radio. Thomas has all the elements, from a voice dripping
with sarcasm and bombastic exuberance to an encyclopedic knowledge
of sports and a devil-may-care attitude.
Moments before the radio show begins, he and his producer,
Kevin, discuss upcoming guests.
"I thought we could get (former Colts quarterback) Earl
Morrall," says Kevin. "Did you ever talk to him in
Baltimore?"
"Oh, sure," says Thomas. "I know Earl."
"Good talker?"
"Are you kidding? Guy's in his 50s, still wears a crewcut!"
When the show starts, Thomas chats up his listeners a bit
to warm up. "We're going to have a special guest whose name
escapes me," he admits, cracking himself up.
During the first commercial break, Thomas confesses his only
gripe with Tampa Bay sports fans: they're too passive.
"They tend to sit back and listen," he says. "We
know they're there. Sometimes I have to kick 'em in the butt.
Sometimes I say, you're killing me, you're going to get me fired,
my daughter's not going to be able to go to a good college ...
Then they call."
Even when they do call, Thomas says area sports fans don't
have the same fire in their belly found in Boston, New York,
Chicago or Baltimore. "You listen to callers in big cities,
they're brutal! Rabid! They're passive here," he says. "There's
a latent audience of Bucs fans that want to go berserk, but what's
to go berserk over? It's the worst team in the league."
Back on the air.
"Is our guest on the phone yet?" Thomas asks Jesse.
"He's not? Play the music. I have to get my notes."
Turning off his microphone, Thomas thumbs through his bulging
briefcase and asks the engineer: "What's our guest's name
again?"
The man's name is Cliff Charpentier and he's just published
his eighth book on fantasy football. Thomas knows the game well
and makes conversation easily. Despite his bluster, he never
hesitates, never takes more than a breath between one solid question
and then another.
Charpentier does not light up the phone lines and Thomas grows
bored. While the fantasy football expert drones on, Thomas turns
off his microphone, coughs, and says, "Guy's pretty exciting."
He then closes his eyes and his forehead bangs into the microphone,
as if the sportscaster has fallen into a deep coma.
The feeling is not held back from his listeners, either. "Thank
you for being on the Sports Line, Cliff," says Thomas, disconnecting
Charpentier. "Exciting guy, that Cliff," he says, laughing.
"Not quite in the Hoyt Wilhelm league ... "
Former knuckleballer Hoyt Wilhelm played Major League Baseball
far later in life than most athletes. Thomas interviewed him
one night for the show. "It was dreadful," he recalls.
"He kept doing this (clears his throat, with great difficulty)
before answering questions. I thought he was going to die. First
of all, why did you come on the show if you're going to die?
And if you're going to die, don't take me with you."
Thomas never set out to be in broadcasting. His mind was set
on journalism until he accidentally walked into the campus radio
station at the University of South Carolina. "I heard this
guy doing sports. He was horrible! I turned to this guy and said,
'He's horrible! He stinks! You ought to fire him!' He said, 'Who
are you?'"
But Thomas won an audition and bulldozed his way on the air,
working as both DJ and sportscaster. He worked in radio for years,
in South Carolina and Baltimore, adding TV later on. This isn't
the first time he's worked both media, either.
Back to the phones.
The blue computer screen to Thomas's left indicates the name
of each caller, their sex, topic of interest and how long they've
been waiting. Cellular car phone callers usually get through
quickest.
Mike from Clearwater: "I think you and Tedd Webb should
get off Ray Perkins' back."
Thomas: "Hey, I haven't mentioned his name in two days!"
Some callers are better than others, of course. They require
the host's full attention. That's when Thomas puts down his latest
Marlboro, his eyes narrow and focus on a point beyond the microphone,
talking to it like the caller is actually in the room.
Thomas, like other talk show hosts at WFLA, has his regular
callers. Kerry is distinguished by his horse laugh. Bill has
a very distinctive voice. And Bill is a retiree from Detroit.
Thomas prefers "open phones" to interviewing authors
and minor celebs, which makes the job seem more like work.
Physically, Thomas is different than you'd expect from seeing
him on TV. Instead of the de rigeour jacket and tie, he shows
up at the radio studio in his golfing clothes, yellow shorts
and multi-colored polo shirt. And where TV makes him look pudgy,
he's not. Thomas is tall, thin, tanned and taut. The camera,
she lies.
Six calls later - and discussion of Arena football, Hugh Culverhouse,
the Seattle Mariners behind him - it's 7:55:01 p.m., time for
the Fat Lady to sing.
"This is a marvelous country, ladies and gentlemen,"
says Thomas as Kate Smith's version of "God Bless America"
comes up behind him. "It's a land that I love ... Stand
beside her, and guide her ... From the mountains, to the prairies
... "
A year ago, a listener sent him a tape of Kate Smith singing
"God Bless America." Thomas used it to close the show
for a week or two as a gag. When he stopped, listeners demanded
her return. Now WFLA promotes Chris Thomas and Kate Smith as
"America's Sweethearts."
"Everybody needs a signature," says Thomas with
a shrug. "Not only that - it shortens the show by three
minutes!"
Program Notes! Upcoming on WMNF 88.5 FM's "The
Women's Show": "Return of the Goddess," narrated
by Merlin Stone (8/17, 24); a call-in with author Diane Stein
(8/31). The show airs Saturdays at 10 a.m. ... WQYK 99.5 FM/1010
AM is carrying the Tampa Bay Buc games on both AM and FM. If
you missed the first two games, you'll be surprised at how well
former Buc David Logan makes the transition to the broadcast
booth. ... "Live with the Governor" - you know, Lawton
Chiles - airs Aug. 20 at 6 p.m. on WTKN 570 AM. The guv will
be taking calls. ... WUSF 90 FM will carry John Adams' new opera,
The Death of Klinghoffer, on Aug. 31 at 1:30 p.m. It is
about the murder of handicapped cruise ship passenger Leon Klinghoffer
aboard the Achille Lauro in 1985.
Attention All PDs! Former 95 YNF disc jockey Robert
Reed asked RadioRadio to get the word out that he is still in
town and looking for work. Reed, 29, has deep roots in the Tampa
Bay area, having been on the scene since 1982. He and his his
wife own a home in St. Pete and are looking for an opportunity
to stick around. If you'd like to contact Reed, call Players
at (813) 578-1400 and we'll pass it on.
Calling All Gators! Mick Hubert, voice of the University
of Florida football Gators, will appear on WTKN's "Tampa
Bay Sports Hour" throughout the upcoming season. His first
appearance will be Sept. 3 at 7 p.m.; thereafter, Hubert will
appear every Monday night. WTKN is also carrying Gator games
and the "Gator Football Report," Monday through Friday
at 7:53 a.m. and 6:23 p.m., as well as "Gator Hotline"
with Hubert and Coach Steve Spurrier, every Thursday at 6:30
p.m.
95 on the Move! WYNF FM made several changes in its
special programs. The new line-up:
Mon.: "Fresh Trax," 11 p.m.; "Rockline,"
11:30 p.m. (Jethro Tull, 8/26; David Bowie, 9/2)
Tues.: "Rock 'n' Roll Six Pack," 11 p.m.
Wed.: "Wednesday Night Live," 11 p.m.
Thurs.: "Local Licks," 11 p.m.
Fri.: "Headbanger's Block," 11 p.m.
Sun.: "In the Studio," 8 a.m. (Grand Funk Railroad,
8/18); "Radio Clash," 8-10 p.m.; "Powercuts,"
10 p.m.-midnight.
Jay Marvin Update! The boisterous, opinionated late
night talk host at WFLA recently devoted his entire show to an
expose of the Liberty Lobby, which owns the Sun Radio Network
and WEND 760 AM. The program was pure theater and we heard folks
talking about it for days.
Speaking of Marvin, he placed another poem, this one with
the Nihilistic Review.
Wanted! Reader Kevin Coldiron collectors radio station
promotional materials. If you have any to buy, sell or trade,
drop him a line at 11401 9th Street N, #305, St. Petersburg,
Florida 33716-2310.
Dittos! U92 DJ Al Cruise did a tremendous job as public
address announcer of the Tampa Bay Storm this season. One more
reason we'll look forward to the team's return next summer.
end
©2001,
All rights reserved. No portion may be reproduced without the
express written permission of the author.
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